“Then the Lord God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him a helper fit for him.” – Genesis 2:18 (ESV)
A few weeks ago, I was having lunch with my sister downtown, when I had a little accident. I am a terrible parallel parker, and in trying to park, I hit another car. This has never happened to me before, and although the damage was minimal, I was afraid to tell Andy. We have only been married for 4 months, and he’s still traveling out of town each week, so I wasn’t sure what the best way would be to tell him. With my heart beating fast, I called him on the phone and spilled the story. And you know what his reaction was? “It’s no big deal, I’m just glad you’re ok.” That was it. Once he got home and actually saw the car, we had a little chuckle about my parking skills, and we moved on. The End.
Fast forward to this past weekend. Although I won’t go into the details, Andy did something that I thought was incredibly stupid. (I’m not proud to say that, but I’m being honest here). As the time progressed, and we dealt with the consequences of his decision, I got madder and madder, until finally, I blew up and snapped at him. A much different reaction than the one he gave me after my bad parking experience.
As I have been studying Eve, I have been more and more convicted about my role as a wife, and how often I fail to meet the requirements. In his book Twelve Extraordinary Women, John MacArthur explains the roles this way,
“Adam was created first; then Eve was made to fill a void in his existence. Adam was the head; Eve was his helper. Adam was designed to be a father, provider, protector, and leader. Eve was designed to be a mother, comforter, nurturer, and helper.”
As I look on this list of “job roles,” I couldn’t help but think about all of the ways Andy meets his requirements. He is a wonderful father. He works long hours and far away (for now) to be a good provider. We have a lovely home, no debt, and I get to fulfill my dream of being a stay at home mom. He would do anything to protect us, and even though I don’t always agree with his decisions, he is always focused on making decisions the way he believes God is leading him.
So, why do I find it so hard to fulfill my roles? Although I love being a mom, I can’t say that I am always great at comforting and nurturing my kids (or husband), and I certainly am not always a happy helper. When the situation arose this past weekend, instead of pointing out the discomfort I was facing, I should have stood behind my husband the same way he did me. My attitude should have been, “It’s no big deal. I’m glad we’re all ok.” Because we were. No harm was done, and one day in the future, I know we will look back on that time and chuckle.
May God continue to point out ways in which I fail my family, so that in the future when mistakes and mishaps occur, instead of following it up with misery, I can show our family mercy and create a merry atmosphere.
(Originally Written in 2013)